Are You Being Too Hard on Yourself? Here Are the Signs

Updated   /   Posted in Wellness  

Being too hard on yourself
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Being too hard on yourself is not a healthy way to live. While striving for excellence and engaging in self-reflection can be beneficial, perpetually blaming yourself for every little mistake or striving for perfection can lead to negative consequences. Recognizing when you are being overly critical of yourself is crucial for your mental well-being.

According to Psychology Today, these are five signs that indicate you might be too hard on yourself. Know these indicators and learn how to cultivate a more compassionate relationship with oneself.

You Keep Criticizing Yourself After Fixing a Mistake

Engaging in self-reflection after making a mistake can be constructive, but incessantly blaming yourself even after you've made amends is harmful. It’s essential to acknowledge that everyone makes mistakes, and learning from them is part of growth.

Once you have addressed the mistake—whether through apologizing, rectifying the situation, or promising not to repeat it—give yourself permission to move forward. Holding onto guilt can hinder your progress and lead to a destructive cycle of self-criticism.

Remember that healthy guilt can serve as motivation for improvement, but once you’ve done your best to rectify a situation, it’s time to allow yourself to grow.

You Always Blame Yourself When Others Mistreat You

Another sign of harsh self-judgment occurs when someone treats you poorly, and your instinct is to wonder what you did wrong. You might question whether you have the right to feel hurt, often leading to an internal narrative that frames the situation solely as your fault.

This mindset can be toxic. It leads to self-doubt and diminishes your rightful emotions. If a peer communicates poorly or acts unfairly, it’s essential to recognize that their behavior may not reflect anything you've done. Remind yourself that you are not to blame for others' poor actions and that it's okay to assert your feelings.

You Always Try to Do More Than Necessary

While striving to give your best effort in every endeavor is admirable, pushing yourself beyond reasonable limits can become detrimental. When your drive for perfection leads to exhaustion, you may face adverse consequences both physically and mentally.

Overworking yourself in areas that are not critical can cause you to neglect more vital aspects of your life. It's essential to maintain a balanced approach—recognize when you're exerting unnecessary energy and allow yourself the grace to step back and conserve your resources for what truly matters.

You Never Admit When You’re Unwell

Some individuals often think that showing signs of weakness, such as illness, can disrupt their productivity. However, it's essential to understand that taking time off when sick is not only wise but necessary.

Pushing yourself to work while unwell is counterproductive. You'll not only be less effective, but you also risk spreading illness to others. Practicing self-care and acknowledging when you need rest is vital. Taking a break to heal is not a failure, but rather a responsible choice that honors your health.

You Feel Constantly Tired

If you find yourself saying "yes" to everything, working excessively hard, and neglecting to take breaks, it’s a clear sign of being too hard on yourself. This relentlessness can lead to chronic fatigue and burnout, both of which are detrimental to your overall well-being.

To combat this, it is crucial to clear your calendar of exhausting commitments and prioritize self-care. Make time for activities that help you relax—whether it’s enjoying a favorite snack, indulging in a calming hobby, or simply having a “me-time” moment. Rest is essential for mental and physical rejuvenation.


Recognizing the signs that indicate you are too hard on yourself is the first step toward fostering a healthier mindset. As you reflect on these signs, consider integrating practices of self-love and self-compassion into your life. Begin by understanding that you are deserving of kindness and forgiveness, just like everyone else.

By gradually letting go of self-blame and embracing a more supportive attitude towards yourself, you can pave the way for personal growth and improved emotional health. Remember, it's okay to be imperfect. Your journey towards self-compassion starts today—cherish yourself and acknowledge that you are doing the best you can.